* The Chemically Enhanced Comedy of Brian Lee *
What a Difference a Year Makes! A new year, a new location. Just one year ago, I was stuck in a shitty day job (working for absolute fucking idiots) in arguably, one of the most God-awful parts of the country (Sorry, Finance Ladies...don't take it personally). Fast forward to today....I still work for idiots, but the weather is MUCH better. Actually, the difference between were I was and where I am are pretty interesting. Where I was: A hybrid town: Half ghetto/half redneck. Where I am: A cool little town called Marina (which I believe is a Spanish word that means "Little Korea"). Interesting Fact: Most common heard phrase - "This place needs more Mexicans". Where I was: County ran out of salt for the roads due to the amount of snow. Where I am: What's snow? Where I was: "PG" meant Prince George County Where I am: " PG" means Pacific Grove. Which one sounds better? Where I was: Every other car is a Ford Mustang or a leased SUV. Where I am: Lexus...BMW...Mercedes. Interesting Fact: You don't see THOSE "stickers" anywhere. (And if you know me, you know just what stickers I am talking about). Where I was: The seasonal opening of a shitty bar (White Trash Mardi Gras). Where I am: Clint fucking Eastwood lives up the street...and he owns a bar that is open ALL THE TIME! Where I was: Girls wearing slippers and pajamas in public. Where I am: Girls wearing tight pants and pirate hooker boots in public. Where I was: Nearest big cities - Baltimore (Crime) and Washington D.C. (even more crime). Where I am: Monterey, San Jose, Oakland, San Francisco...you know, TOURIST DESTINATIONS!!! I could go on and one (and I probably should....jelous?), but I won't. You just let me know when you are ready to come out and visit. Till next time......drinks are on me, BL |
| next show: to be announced...soon! |
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| Reasons to Drink for January: 1 1943 - Happy Birthday Don Novello (Father Guido Sarducci). 2 1967 - Happy Birthday Tia Carrere. 3 1970 - Davy Jones announced he was leaving The Monkees. He went on to a lucrative career in....uh....what did happen to him? 4 1999 - Former professional wrestler Jesse Ventura was sworn in as Minnesota's 37th governor. 5 1998 - Sony Bono died in a skiing accident. See, even SEMI-famous people shouldn't ski. 6 1987 - Elton John cancelled all live performances for a year after having throat surgery. Insert your own "stuck in throat" joke here. 7 1948 - Happy Birthday to Rock & Roll bad boy, Kenny Loggins. 8 1973 - Elvis Presley sued Priscilla Presley for a divorce. 9 1944 - Happy Birthday Jimmy Page. 10 1949 - Vinyl records were introduced by RCA and Columbia. 11 1967 - Jimi Hendrix recorded "Purple Haze." 12 1971 - "All In the Family" debuted on CBS-TV. 13 1979 - The Y.M.C.A. filed a lawsuit against the Village People over their song, "Y.M.C.A." 14 1966 - David Jones changed his last name to Bowie to avoid confusion with Davy Jones from the Monkees. Holy shit...Davy Jones has gotten TWO mentions already....he's on the comeback!! 15 1948 - Ronnie Van Zant would have been 64 years old today. 16 1976 - The album, "Frampton Comes Alive", was released. 17 1949 - Comedian Andy Kaufman would have turned 63 today. 18 1974 - Bad Company was formed. 19 1951 - Happy Birthday Martha Davis (The Motels) 20 1969 - Elvis Presley recorded "In the Ghetto" and "Suspicious Minds." 21 - Happy Birthday Linda C. Have yourself a short snort at the Regal Beagel. 22 1879 - British troops were massacred by the Zulus at Isandhlwana. Can the Brits beat ANYONE? 23 1964 - Happy Birthday Mariska Hargitay (Law & Order: SVU) 24 1949 - John Belushi would have turned 63 today. 25 1971 - Charles Manson was found guilty of one count of conspiracy to commit murder. 26 1934 - The Apollo Theatre opened in New York City. 27 1756 - Composer Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart was born. 28 1978 - The Doobie Brothers made an appearance on ABC-TV's "What's Happening." Who doesn't remember that? 29 1970 - Happy Birthday Heather Graham. 30 1900 - The British fighting the Boers in South Africa ask for a larger army. I am noticing a trend here. 31 1970 - Happy Birthday Minnie Driver. |
| Brian-tologist of the Month! Every month, Cerebral-punishment.com is going to recognize one of Brian Lee's best fans.....the Brian-tologist of the Month! This months' winner is: Jeremy S., Patuxent River, MD. Congrats to "Stump" for beating the dreaded "PTS Monster". I am sure the "Elephant Walkers" will take credit for it, though. Keep up the good work! |
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| Next show: To Be Announced. |
| "Brian-Buster" Recommendations" Must See: "Take Me Home Tonight". If you were a fan of what the 80s were REALLY like, you will dig this movie. Plus, it has Dan Fogler in it. Must Avoid: "Hellraiser: Revelations". Newest movie in the "Hellraiser" series. The guy who played the original Pinhead is gone...therefore, the movie sucks. |
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| Ask Moose-Tradamus ! It's your opportunity to ask C.P.s official mascot, Manitoba Moose, anything! Your future, love life, stock tips, whatever. Send in your questions and see who has the "Moose-Tradamus Question of the Month"! Merrill M. of Marina, CA asks: "Who are you voting for in the upcoming Republican Primary?" Moose-Tradamus says: "I am not sure yet. I am waiting to see if Brian Lee is going to run for office. What do you think? Should he?". |
